The dress:

I let Tripp go shopping we me, and oh the judgmental looks and comments from the salespeople.

Now don't get me wrong, it's not that I'm not superstitious. I am very superstitious, but, I am also very precise. The superstition is, that it is bad luck from the groom to see the bride in her wedding dress. It is not bad luck for the groom to see the bride in 2 dozen other wedding dresses that she hates.

Wait, that's not completely right... I did not try on 2 dozen dresses. I think, with the time Tripp and I went, the time I went with Nicole, the second time I went with Tripp and the time I went on my own... I tried on 12 dresses? Maybe 14.

My thought process in this was, I undoubtedly think some dresses are hideous, and just because Tripp is male and has mostly no opinion on things like this doesn't mean there aren't going to be some things he genuinely hates.

Now I know the groom is supposed to be all in awe and think you look great in whatever dress you choose, and I am sorry for some dress designers, but some of this crap is just ugly. And I know a good bit of guys are going to be freaked by ball gowns. I'm freaked by ball gowns. I can't find my legs.

So, I wanted to take Tripp with me, at least in the early picking process, to get an idea of not only the styles that I like but also of the styles he likes. This is about both of us. I don't want him standing at the alter in a bright purple velour suit and I'm sure he doesn't want me walking down the aisle wearing this.

Don't hate. You know a little mid-drift is classy.

Anyway, it turned out to be a great idea. He had some really good thoughts and pointed out a lot I might not notice or consider and he made me feel better about dresses I was wary of simply because he really liked them.

By the end of our first venture, we had both decided that we didn't like trains. They're bulky, unnecessary, make alteration costs higher, and I am really clumsy. He liked ruched skirts, I like bunched off-the-shoulder tops. However, in dresses that had both it just looked like too much. We both also agree that it could have a lot of pleating and ruching OR it could have bling, but both was too much to handle.

I eventually came across an Alfred Angelo dress that I loved... in a magazine. So I called around to every bridal store within an hour drive and nobody had it in my size. Oh yeah, did I mention I'm a size two?

I'm NOT a size two, I'm a size four. Seemingly in some attempt to fool dumb brides into thinking they are thinner on their wedding day, wedding gowns run a size smaller. Whatever. The problem is that so little of the population is a two that nobody carries them just on hand.

I eventually found a SIZE TEN in a similar style that I tried on and ended up hating.

By this time I had also found an Alfred Angelo version of a David's Bridal dress that Tripp loved.

This is where things got tricky. I came upon a site (thank you Google Shopping) that could make either one of these dresses, custom to fit, for $230.

Now, I am not a naive person. I think I might of just been blinded by wedding excitement but it was not until I had polled my friends and family, picked a dress, planned my veil and jewelry around it and was ready to order that I realized this company was in China. (It's Queen Is A Girl, by the way).

Luckily, the registration on their site was as crappy as Rip Off Report claims their products to be and I didn't go through with ordering.

At this point I had come across a reputable knock-off site that I was really enthusiastic about until I had some correspondence with them. I wish I'd saved the message (I can't even recall the company name now). I wrote the woman to ask for a quote, that's how it works, you send them pictures and ask for a quote, and I told her that I'd found this dress online and loved it and found out that the company I was ordering from was in China and was a bad investment.

I got back an e-mail chastising me, telling me how ALL these dresses are made in China and that's how they do it so cheap (and here I'm thinking, "Didn't you say you were in Michigan, what do you care...?") and then she offered to make the dress for $60 more than I would pay for the real thing.

However, during my day waiting for her rude reply, I had been scouring eBay for a used dress and I found one with a horribly blurry picture but that looked like it had iridescent bead work.

I love iridescence. My jewelry and headpiece are Aurora Borealis crystals, my engagement ring is an opal. This would be the dress for me. I e-mailed the seller for a clearer picture and I had my dress within a week and for half the price than my Chinese dress and a fifth of the price of what it cost new. Part of it was missing - a panel that goes between your skin and the corseting so you don't have badunkadunk hanging out all the way down the aisle, and the seller refunded me part of my money to have one made. It's gorgeous. I don't have a full length picture, but the skirt is very full and satin with a covering of beaded tulle and here is the bodice:

Maggie Sottero Flirt 4258

The dress is actually a Maggie Sottero prom dress. But it's nicer than any prom I've ever been to.

I have some full length shots, but they're all of me in the dress and I can't put them up here because, after all, I am very superstitious.

Venue:

Tripp and I were both very enthusiastic about an outdoor wedding and reception. For Alabama to be such an outdoorsy and beautiful place the amount of outdoor venues in Huntsville is severely lacking.

There's Big Spring Park, which cannot be privatized. Though, most people will not walk through the middle of your wedding, there will still be people playing frisbee thirty yards away, dogs peeing on trees, and ducks wandering aimlessly. That coupled with the fact that somehow with all of the engineers in Huntsville they could not construct a park without pools of gnats and buckling brick walkways makes it not worth the trouble. Also, this venue offers not dressing quarters or reception space.

There's Burritt on the Mountain, which was a favorite of ours as it was our first date and the place of our engagement. It is also very expensive and honestly a little stuffy. I mean it is a gorgeous place, it just has this stuffy feel.

There's also a chapel somewhere up on Monte Sano, I never went and looked at it because I saw the price online. Sheesh. The pictures didn't look that good. Just for the record, we're paying a little more than this for a possible 75 times the guest allowance (though we really only have maybe 15 times that) and as many attendants as we want, and dressing rooms, and... well pretty much everything this place doesn't offer.

There's a tiny wooden chapel up on Green Mountain and a pavilion that looks over a lake that comes with the rental fee. I never called for a price because when I say tiny chapel, I mean TINY. With a lot of luck and 5 extra benches we could fit 60 people MAYBE. Also, it's about a 100 yard hike through some woods. Not a bad hike, but not one I want to do in a wedding gown. Furthermore, you don't get full run of the preserve when you rent meaning anyone else who comes in can just be all up in the pavilion and hogging the swings and benches on the lake's beach.

And then there's the Botanical Gardens which offer several different venues, all of them you have to call for pricing. I didn't, because I've been to a wedding there and I'm pretty sure we can't afford it.

I imagine you can rent some part of Bridge Street, and there are probably a variety of churches without outdoor areas... but none of this was "us" or in our price range or "us" enough to justify going out of our price range.

I happened to luck upon a childhood friend getting married on Facebook right after the pictures of her wedding had been posted... it was then I was reminded of a well-kept secret called AM Booth's Lumberyard.

It's not that it's a secret, it's that it's just not for everybody, at least not for a wedding per-say.

We loved it. For around 400 dollars (plus a refundable deposit) you have a full days access to a venue that holds 750 people. However, your event can only last 5 hours.

I'll post some pictures of the space, but it really does more justice to explain it.

It's an old lumberyard renovated to be an artsy party space. It has a couple hundred mismatched chairs and some tables for your use, a small gazebo, a train car (that will be a functioning restaurant by September), a stage with lights and VIP booth, a bar with an old bathtub that you can fill with ice to keep beer or can drinks in, a hammock, a loading dock that is now a fountain, lots on shaded and open space, artwork, white Christmas lights, and so much more.

You get to use a small kitchen and dressing area as well as an indoor area with chapel windows. There is a bar located in a building on the premises that your guests could go to if they wanted something other than what you're serving.

You have access to a basketball goal and foosball table if you so wish and you can move any of the numerous pieces of lawn furniture anywhere to create the layout you want.

It is very offbeat and some people would probably find it ugly or tacky but I love it.

It's taken a lot of stress off planning because I can basically show up there that morning and I don't have to arrange for any vendors to be let in, I can get dressed there and it is literally like a half mile from where we live.

Pros: Very flexible, very customizable, cheap (although rates are getting raised because of the upgrades - luckily, we signed our contract before all that).

Cons: You gotta be weird! Also, it's about 10 yards from the train tracks so you have to call the depot and find out when the trains are running and either schedule around it or throw a fit so that they delay.

Save the dates:

Save the dates can be expensive and a hassle just to tell people, "Hey! Soon I will be sending you an invitation! If you are somehow challenged in how mail works then this is a reminder for you not to overlook it!" Also, for it to say all that is a bit contradictory because someone could just as easily overlook a save the date.

When I was still struggling with an cheap and easy idea for save the dates (and leaning towards skipping them altogether) I got a Facebook ad for a little start-up company called Greenvelope that offers web based guest list and invitation managing.

You can purchase a package that ranges anywhere from just save the dates (which is free) to the full set up RSVPs and thank you cards.

We decided that for us save the dates were the way to go. Paperless invites just weren't easy enough for a large enough portion of our guest list.

When you register with Greenvelope you can upload your guest list via e-mail or input manually. The guest information includes a place for how many people are expected for that particular guest (John Doe Plus One = 2, The Smith Family = 6). It also give you the capability to e-mail all guests at once and to see who has opened their virtual invite (this way, you can tell if somebody's invite might have sent to their spam folder and remained unchecked - this was a problem for a number of my guests).

You get a choice from a lot of different templates (I chose dandelions, I sort of have a thing for dandelions). The text editor is set up in a basic "we announce yada yada this person and that person yada yada month/date/year" format but if you're careful enough you can fit more in. This was nice for us as we used the save the dates as a sort of "RSVP for invitation" service. This gave us an idea of how many out of town guests REALLY thought they could make it and allowed us to skip sending out some invites without hurting feelings. It also provided a quick and efficient way to collect snail mail address for those who were confident that they could make it. We asked people to simply RSVP with address to a Google account setup for the event. I also really recommend setting up an e-mail for your wedding. Use it on any forms on websites of vendors that relate to the wedding. This way, when jerks like David's Bridal sell your information it all goes to one tidy place. It also provides an e-mail that the couple can access without infringing on each other's privacy. I used it for all my online transactions for the wedding, all guest correspondence, and anytime I just felt the urge to "REGISTER TO WIN FIVE FREE BRIDAL PARTY DRESSES!" Google is a great place to setup a wedding e-mail account mainly because you can use Google Docs for guest lists, shopping lists, or to jot down to-dos and you can make the document accessible to your primary e-mail account and that of your future spouse.

We also managed to link the complimentary wedding website that The Knot gives you when you register for their (re: awful) website.

Pros: Quick, free, efficient, saves trees. Who doesn't love trees? It's a cute idea most of your guests will find interesting and allows you to cut corners with tradition and maybe even save some money.

Cons: Some people (older relatives, friends who think using the internet isn't indie enough) will never get it or open it. For others, it might get marked as spam, or they can't view it at work and forget when their at home. However, most of these problems won't hurt the majority of your guests.

All in all, I recommend this to people on a bduget or DIY wedding, especially if most of your guests are wired in. It helped me tremendously and set the tone for how low key and offbeat our wedding will be. The template also inspired my template for this website and (I haven't hashed this out yet) probably how my programs will look.

My save the dates: